Monday, January 6, 2014

Death...

A couple of months ago I posted about how I felt like I lost touch with my pets.  I've reconnected with my special boy, my kitty Sampson, but his health has been worrying me Most importantly I felt disconnected from my special boy Sampson.  I got over it though, it's hard to try to ignore someone so eager to please and love you.  Lately he hasn't been feeling well.  He's been battling feline chronic renal failure for a few years now.  In November he took a turn for the worse and we started him on IV fluids daily to help flush out his kidneys. 
To fully understand and feel my connection with Sampson you will need some background.  My history with Sampson starts in 2008.  We had just lost our older cast Jack to some unknown affliction.  I was sad and depressed.  Sampson was at the shelter, it was a few months out from Jack's passing, it was as if Jack led me to Sampson.  When we adopted him, Sammy had an upper respitory infection.  I took him to the vey, they gave hime antibiotics, I gave hime love and affection, he got better.  I was actually able to help hime, something I wasn't able to do for Jack.  Sampson had something special about him.  For a nine and a half year old tripod, he had spunk!  He healed my soul, made life less sad.  Sampson made me fall head over heals for him.  He loved me so much, cuddled with me when I went to sleep, sat on my lap when I was on the couch.  So sweet, so kind, it was like he's intuitive.  When I was sad, he would reach out a paw and place it on me.  "There, there Mamma, it'll be okay."  He would run around and play and be so happy, he made me smile and laugh. 
When we lost Delilah, he did the same thing, he help me put the pieces of my sould back together, despite me being a jerk about it.  I would try to be aloof and avoid his love but Sampson was persistant, he's so sweet, kept pushing and making me hold him and cuddle.  He made the pain more bearable.  He was the one who sat with me when my husband was at work or had other obligations, Sampson kept me company, and he did it without complaint.  Even before our loss, he was the one who would always carefully prop himself next to me and the baby bump that was Delilah. 
On Friday the third, not even a year after we lost Delilah, we had to say goodbye to Sampson.  He held on for so ling but his kidney had stopped functioning.  He was in pain and not happy, but he still tried for us, because he loved us that much.  It would not have been fair to make him suffer, we made the decision to let him go be with Delilah, to ease his pain like he did ours.  My heart is broken again. I miss Sampson so much.  There will never be another kitty like him.
I always imagined Delilah having tea parties with him, dressing him up and offering him sandwiches.  He would have gone along with it too, he was that kind; the sandwiches would have been a bonus for him.  I hope they are together now, having awesome tea parties and keeping each other company.  I love you two.

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