Sad and Dejected

The first thing I saw on TV today was the news coverage at the Boston Marathon.  Such horrible things happen.  I thought about my baby girl seeing this happen up there and I found myself telling her:  "These bad things happen but there is still is good in the world."  I didn't want her to be scared and not want to come back and be our baby.  

I miss her, I miss her so much and lately I've been trying to distract myself with projects and other stuff.   But it's so difficult, I think about her and how we can't be together.  I find myself thinking about her final moments and all the "what ifs..."  I miss her and I'm mad at the universe for separating us.  I can't sleep at night, I stay up and think about how we should be together, how it's not fair.